Wednesday, November 12, 2008

in the company of which I speak

but is he only staying in the sarah relationship for the sex? from Taffy

Good question. Am I only sticking it out with Sarah- might not be the best comeback line...OK, being with Sarah can be overwhelming. Yeah, she's hot, but I can get a little lost with all her "directions". And yeah, it can be a little intimidating. I mean, she can get a little testy if some thing just don't go in the right order. I just laugh it off usually. Don't know how long that will last. I keep waiting to hear her say something like, "Lon would have never done it that way..." And maybe that's what holds me back that I have to be compared to somebody like Lon. I haven't said anything about it. But its there in the back of my mind.

I have to keep remembering, we've been going out how long now? You know I haven't really counted the days actually, but its the longest I've ever been with somebody. And I really wanted to see if I could be the better boyfriend than my half-brother, Lon. Yet I feel I get caught up in all the stuff that Sarah wants and I'm wondering if she even thinks about what I want.

I want to slow it down. You know, savor the little stuff. And sometimes, I get that. Like dancing in the kitchen, cuddling while watching TV. I just don't want her to go overkill with all this. You know like that song from the 80's "Don't let love tear us apart".

And yeah, every-time we have sex there is a slight fear..what if we have a kid. That can really mute the mood.

And I think that hurts the most...the thought of being used for one thing. What if that's what this is all about? Her wanting a baby. She hadn't said it. I haven't said it. So yeah, I just really want us to enjoy each others company, and it doesn't always have to be about sex.

6 comments:

taffy. said...

good.

Cate said...

So cool that "Lonnie" actually answers his readers' questions! He seems pretty confused though. If Sarah is really only using him because she wants a baby, then that's pretty selfish of her.

Cate said...

Thanks for your comment. Yeah, weed is always considered "harmless" even though it's really not. I'm glad Lonnie hasn't started smoking it.

Ana said...

The savoring the little stuff sounds perfect. But he should break up with her if she just uses him for a baby.

autumn said...

when are they going to break-up? lol. kidding. =]]

Cate said...

Woah what an evil comment autumn ^^ I dunno, I just can't imagine them breaking up..